The Reality of Trying to ‘Do It All’ as a Mom

Recently, our dishwasher was broken for almost two months. At first, I thought it would be a minor inconvenience, but those two months changed my perspective completely. Hand-washing dishes every day felt like it consumed all my time, leaving everything else in chaos. The house looked like a bomb had gone off—clothes and toys everywhere—and I felt overwhelmed, as if I was sinking under the pressure to “do it all.”

This experience highlighted the unrealistic expectations placed on moms to juggle everything perfectly. From being a great wife and mom to keeping the house spotless, society’s standard can be both exhausting and unattainable. In this post, I’ll share the challenges I’ve faced, what I’ve learned, and strategies that help (and sometimes don’t) in balancing it all.

The Juggle is Real

Balancing motherhood often means juggling three major areas of life: marriage, parenting, and self-care. Let’s take a closer look at the challenges of each.

1. Marriage: Keeping the Spark Alive

• Making Time for Your Partner: Amidst school runs, bedtime routines, and endless to-do lists, finding time to connect with your partner can feel impossible. But those small moments—like a quick coffee date after the kids are asleep—are vital for a strong relationship.
• Sharing the Load: Parenting and household responsibilities work best as a team effort, but even then, differing expectations and stress can arise. Open communication is key.
• Finding Romance and Fun: Life with kids often pushes romance to the backseat. Reconnecting, even in small ways, can make a big difference.

2. Parenting: Meeting Endless Needs

• Being Present: Parenting is rewarding, but it requires constant energy and focus. Whether helping with schoolwork or providing emotional support, staying fully engaged can leave you feeling stretched thin.
• Teaching and Guiding: Beyond the daily grind, parenting involves instilling values and life skills, which takes patience and effort.
• The Guilt Factor: It’s easy to feel guilty when you can’t give your kids 100% of your attention, but it’s important to remember that quality matters more than quantity.

3. Self-Care: Reclaiming Your Identity

• Finding “Me Time”: Personal time feels like a luxury, but it’s essential. Even a 10-minute coffee break or skincare routine can help you recharge.
• Maintaining Well-being: Physical and mental health should be priorities. Self-care isn’t selfish—it’s necessary to avoid burnout and stay grounded.
• Redefining Your Role: Balancing motherhood with hobbies, friendships, and goals outside of being “mom” helps you maintain a sense of identity.

Why “Doing It All” Is So Hard

The pressure to be perfect comes from many sources:

• Mom Guilt: The feeling that you’re not doing enough—for your kids, partner, or home—can be overwhelming.
• Social Media: Perfectly curated posts make it easy to compare yourself to others, but they rarely reflect real life.
• The Mental Load: Managing everyone’s schedules, meals, and needs often feels like a full-time job in itself.

Here’s the truth: no one’s life is as perfect as it seems. You’re doing your best, and that’s enough.

Realistic Approaches to Balancing It All

1. Prioritize What Matters

Focus on what truly matters. For me, that’s family time and self-care. Weekly check-ins can help you reassess priorities and let go of tasks that aren’t essential.

2. Learn the Art of Saying “No”

Taking on too much leads to stress. Whether it’s declining an extra commitment or accepting help at home, saying “no” can protect your peace.

3. Embrace Small Moments for Yourself

Self-care doesn’t have to be extravagant. Simple joys—like reading a book, journaling, or sipping a quiet cup of coffee—can have a big impact.

4. Let Go of Perfection

• Embrace the Mess: It’s okay if your house isn’t spotless or your kids make noise—it’s part of real life.
• Social Media Reality Check: Remember, no one has it all together, even if their Instagram says otherwise.

Tips for Staying Grounded

1. Daily Grounding Practices

Incorporating small, grounding activities into your routine can make a big difference. For me, blogging, stretching, and journaling have been incredibly therapeutic.

2. Remember Your “Why”

Taking care of yourself isn’t just for you—it benefits your whole family. When you’re rested and recharged, you can be the best version of yourself for them.

3. Lean on Your Support System

Friends and family are essential. Whether you need advice, a helping hand, or a good laugh, your support network can lighten the load.

Redefining Success

Success doesn’t have to mean doing everything perfectly. It’s about finding what works for your family and embracing the little wins along the way.

• Set Realistic Goals: Focus on what truly matters and let go of unnecessary pressure.
• Celebrate Small Victories: Whether it’s getting through a tough day or finding five minutes to yourself, every win counts.

Let’s Build a Supportive Community

At the end of the day, no one can truly “do it all,” and that’s okay. Each messy, beautiful moment is part of your family’s unique story.

Join the Conversation

• What helps you stay balanced as a mom?
• How do you prioritize your well-being?
• Share your tips, stories, and ideas in the comments—we’re all in this together!

Final Thoughts

Motherhood is a juggling act, but it doesn’t have to be perfect to be beautiful. Take joy in the little wins, give yourself grace, and remember that you’re doing an amazing job.

If you enjoyed this post, be sure to subscribe to my blog for more stories, tips, and real-life reflections. And don’t forget to share this with a mom who could use a reminder that she’s not alone in this journey!